Every once in a while – I need a break; Life has been busy and strange – and now things seems to be settling down. Thank you so much for your questions whether as to I had been adopted, kidnapped by aliens or just been so absentminded that I forgot that I owned a blog.
Hmm – as a part of my new lifestyle I have devoted my time to wonder the marvels of HR – being plenty of them I might add.
I have come across a phenonomen called “The Unicorn Applicant”; you – being a smart reader would ofcourse laugh: “Unicorns does not exist”. I beg to differ, ladies and gentlemen, they do. You just have to click your heels together and make a wish (remember to ask a return ticket if you go to Kansas).
Cue: new setting. The headhunter or eager Recruitment consultant is in a meeting with the creme de l’organisation: The recruiting manager which is grasping a the Holy grail of recruitment “The Job / Function description form v123.2.Alpha”. properly issued by the resident evil: The HR Department. On that form all the dreams, hopes and ambitions are for ever chisled. If Moses ever comes down that hill again, he will be holding the aforementioned form.
The contents of the jobdescription form, here from now refered to as “the Word” are often made by the Manager, sometimes in cooperation with the HR Henchman, but more often made in solitude, based on all the shortcomings in the candidate presently occupying the desk. If you are fortunate the form might actually be based on the present holder of the job, but – I know – you are laughing. Stay with me – it is a fairytale after all.
After the meeting between the HR henchman and the bright lighthouse that leads his/her troops through the Fog-Of-Recession – a Job is created. The pride is glowing in the eyes of the Manager “My, when I need such a creature, I must be fighting an important war” as the job is posted on all the medias available – being twitter, facebook, linkedin, ebay or other “dating”sites of the job-desperate.
The HR henchman thinks “I ought to have told him: Unicorns does not exist, but what the hell, we will make do with the applications that roll in anyways…”, sips some coffee, sighs deeply and curls behind the desk.
The Applications roll in… most of the candidates are qualified, but according to the desires of the manager, no one seems to fit. Business as ususal, the Henchman thinks…smirks, erhhh thinks….
Now this candidate sends his/her application and actually fits. Dead on target. The Henchman has only one thing to do: call the candidate and reveals the biggest bluff in the HR business: “Nobody really wants to hire the perfect candidate”…
Giving my recruitment career I estimate that 1 out of 150 applications are Unicorns…. I have done my share of recruitment, but I estimate that out of approx 140 jobs I filled, only two, maybe three hired where unicorns.
I really hope that it was because the hiring manager actually matured or saw something he/she never imagined would trigger imagination and possibilities.
But – being a cynic- I must say one thing “We really do not want what we are looking for”…
Not blind from the shortcoming of my profession, perhaps I should have stood my ground and persisted, argued and fought. But I am NOT the Manager. I comfort my self during the cold nights, when the rain strikes the window and the hounds are howling, that I have really fought for making realistic jobdescriptions, being honest with the future candidates and most of all when looking for posting a job: It is based on realism rather than on the slightly overambitious aspirations of a job description form.
It is really bad karma looking for something and when it then comes knocking, sends it away!!!
No wonder that Unicorns are rare. They hide…
Your thoughts,
Kindest,
Steen
– but I think it is because we often become pariahs of the organisation. We discipline people, we enforce corporate policies, we are often caught in OHS with all the legislation that acompanies that. We are the bottleneck – if you ask the managers – that stomps the growth.
